Shortly after restarting this blog I met someone online. He is everything I have always thought I wanted. Tall, handsome, friendly, ambitious, a total Hufflepuff, sexual chemistry, a GRE level vocabulary...he is essentially the hot gay nerd. I struck gold. We have been on three amazing dates, he has slept over twice, he met my roommate. I have gushed about him to my friends and coworkers. But for some reason this week I got this sinking pit in my stomach that I shouldn't get too attached. I hadn't thought once about jumping ship and then this week it hit me that I was nervous about what was going to happen next. There is some part of me that is petrified that what happened with Othello is going to happen here. I have been protecting him from the blog, because usually by the time I write a post about people that means they are not long for my dating world. I realized tonight that was ridiculous. Tonight is the first night that I have sent him a text message and he hasn't responded. I know that's stupid, and I know I'm being ridiculous and that this might mean nothing, but in my experience this is the beginning of the end.
By the third date the charm of dating someone who works as much as I do for my patients who have nothing has worn off and you want someone who can devote more time to you. By the end of the third date, you're sick of my swearing sailor mouth and want someone who can just chill and be cool. By the end of the third date you realize my life is really a fucking shit show and I am rarely in charge of what I am doing from one second to the next. By the end of the third date you realize that my room is always messy and I really don't care much about my appearance. By the end of the third date you realize my taste in everything from clothing to music isn't eclectic its just fucking weird and you are over it. By the end of the third date you realize I really am not that nice of a person and that the reason I have my jobs is to give me some chance of not going directly to hell. By the end of the third date you realize that I am more trouble than I'm worth and it would be way easier to get some Grindr slut to suck you off. By the end of the third date you realize that until you have a conversation with me about where we are in terms of dating I will assume that the buck stops there. By the end of the third date if I am still interested I have already become the clingy, annoying, and desperate boy that no one really wants to date.
So here I sit....several days after the end of the third date....and all I face are mounting insecurities about things that I have said, actions I have taken, and text messages I have and have not sent since we started dating.......waiting patiently to hear the chime from my phone indicating a text rather than the depressing trill of some horny Grindr queen.
Showing posts with label gay boy problems. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gay boy problems. Show all posts
Thursday, February 16, 2017
Thursday, August 14, 2014
Monday, December 9, 2013
Every Once in a While
There are some days where all of a sudden I am overcome by the fear that I am going to be alone forever. It is a paralyzing/crippling/take-your-breath-away type of fear that first thing in the morning when I wake up and realize that I am all alone in my house occasionally swallows me whole. There is no real trigger and no real way to assuage the consternation flooding my body.
Eventually something jars me back to the real world; usually a call from work, or my mother, or a roommate, or a friend. For the minutes when I am laying in bed fraught with the conclusion that my bed is going to forever belong only to me it seems as though there is nothing that can pull my mind back from its interminable contemplation. But like magic....something always does....thank God....
Sometimes I worry that one day nothing will jar me back. I will become one of the crazy old gay spinsters who doesn't even have a cat because he is too afraid it will eat him when he goes. I will be alone in my house with my books and my education and a career that will have long withered away and I will have no one.
What, an uplifting post? I really should be going back to work. I decided to work from home today (one of the perks of public health nursing). I felt like I needed to get this off of my chest before I could proceed in helping anyone else though.
Let's hope one of these posts doesn't happen again for a while.
Chau!!
Eventually something jars me back to the real world; usually a call from work, or my mother, or a roommate, or a friend. For the minutes when I am laying in bed fraught with the conclusion that my bed is going to forever belong only to me it seems as though there is nothing that can pull my mind back from its interminable contemplation. But like magic....something always does....thank God....
Sometimes I worry that one day nothing will jar me back. I will become one of the crazy old gay spinsters who doesn't even have a cat because he is too afraid it will eat him when he goes. I will be alone in my house with my books and my education and a career that will have long withered away and I will have no one.
What, an uplifting post? I really should be going back to work. I decided to work from home today (one of the perks of public health nursing). I felt like I needed to get this off of my chest before I could proceed in helping anyone else though.
Let's hope one of these posts doesn't happen again for a while.
Chau!!
Sunday, December 8, 2013
A Ginger, A Black-A-Rican, and a Freak!
So I have a few updates. No one new, just some old recycled folks.
I guess I should start with the oldest in the repertoire. This weekend I invited Hickey to come by so we could fool around again. Our Friends with Benefits thing has worked out far better than the two of us dating ever could have. We both have a mutual respect for each other and we both have pretty high standards for who we actually sleep with which is really comforting in a way. For instance, despite the fact that we have both gone out on dates with several people the only people we have had anal sex with in the last four months have been each other.
The other nice thing about the sex with Hickey is that we have both come to the understanding that sex is it. We aren't looking for it to be anything else. We are both really comfortable asking the other to do things sexually to get each other off. The freakier the sex gets, the better it is, and the more we both just really have a good time when we get together. All of the awkwardness from our first Friends with Benefits encounter is officially gone. We both understand what is happening and we have finally settled into a wonderful rhythm of fucking, sucking, and kinking. (I'm not sure if that is a word, but it is now!)
Every once in a while I get this feeling that Hickey is waiting for me to ask him to be my boyfriend, but he always assures me that is not the case. I'm hoping that is true because I could very easily be setting myself up for a repeat of the Panera incident....let's hope that does not happen...again!
The next person that I have updates on is BRP. As I have said before BRP is perfect for me on paper, but there is definitely something off about the whole thing. For this reason while I was away BRP texted me to say hi, but I did not respond. When I finally got back I let him know I was home and that I still had his hat from his night time visit, but I did not hear from him. It wasn't until the Saturday after Thanksgiving that I heard back from him. It was a very short message simply asking when he could retrieve his hat. It was late and I figured it must have been a drunken response to my text so I let him know I was still interested in seeing him.
I got a second equally as curt response. Not being one for passive aggressive games, I flat out asked if he was upset because his messages were so curt and almost bitter. He then went into a long explanation about that not being the case and we set up a time to see each other the next week. I almost had to cancel on him because of a patient emergency, but fortunately I was able to move things around and still make a late night coffee date work.
We met at 1369 Cafe in Inman Square. It was packed so we ended up just getting coffee and walking around Cambridge a little bit. Ultimately, we ended up stopping at a pizza place so he could get food since he still had not eaten and we both wanted a place to sit and talk.
The conversation was very cordial at first, no mention of the curtness from the texts, but I can never leave well enough alone. I picked the scab and before I knew it I was getting the litany of reasons that he was "pissed" not bitter about my lack of response to him while I was away. We had quite a discussion about his gripes with me.
What was really interesting was hearing all of the things that BRP considered red flags about myself.
Let me begin:
1. I'm young
2. I've never been in a relationship
3. I am sexually expressive/adept
4. I ignored him for 2 weeks
5. I am ambitious/driven
He qualified all of these statements with: "I mean you have all of these things which individually are red flags but together they don't bother me." How charming right?
I have to be honest; none of his 5 things surprised me. I recognize them as part of the issues I have in committing to any relationship anyways so the fact that someone finally recognizes them as issues in a relationship with me is something that I just have to come to terms with as I continue dating.
Ultimately, I can't do anything about the fact that I am young. I also could do something about never having been in a relationship, but I won't. I refuse to be in a relationship just to be in a relationship. I don't care if that means I am single for another 20 years. I am waiting for someone I really think is worth it. I could do something about the sexual expressiveness, but I don't want to. I like sex. I enjoy sex. It's fun and I am not going to apologize because I know what I want and I'm good at what I do. I could also do something about the ambition I have related to my career, but I won't. My career and my patients are really important to me and I am not going to change that just to please someone or enter into a relationship. The thing about me ignoring him for 2 weeks...well that I'll own. I definitely could have changed that and I definitely should have.
After he finished eating I offered to drive him home since he had driven me home the last time. I realized that things definitely still weren't right in the car, but I couldn't just send him back into his apartment when we got to his place. I felt like he was looking for an excuse to blow me off or just write me off completely and that annoyed me. I know this is absolutely insane, but I hate the idea that someone would write me off based on those 5 red flags. I felt like I needed to do something to prove he was wrong, even though he wasn't.
I am officially insane! I know and I can't help it. I went in for a kiss literally mid-awkward conversation where it seemed like he didn't want to see me again. I ended up in his apartment and we started making out. He stopped me and insisted that we not hook up. He told me he promised himself he wouldn't do that with me. I was being rejected sexually and I was stunned. I don't like the feeling that someone could just choose not to do something they wanted to. The idea that someone could have that kind of self control around me perturbed me a little bit. So I tried harder. Eventually I won him over and I was blowing him. Then I decided to respect his initial desires and stopped before he came. That was pretty bitchy of me but I couldn't help it. I had to prove the point that my sexual prowess could win him over.
I AM COMPLETELY INSANE!
I then left his apartment and hopped in my car and went home. I ended up seeing him again on Saturday for a cute lunch date in Harvard Square. I was super late (this is becoming a pattern for me unfortunately). We met at Tory Row and sat at the bar.
The restaurant was amazing: a great menu, a great atmosphere, and the bartender had an amazing ass. The fact that I am commenting on the bartender's ass should be a pretty good indicator for how my date went. I can't help but feel bad for how I behaved actually. I was sort of an ass. I was trying to treat him the way I treat a lot of my old friends. I was joking around and sort of making fun of him a little bit, but I'm not sure it really came off the right way. Luckily, this guy likes himself enough, and has a high enough self-esteem, that the whole time I was ribbing him he was pointing out how wrong I was.
When it came time to pay the bill I pulled out my card to pay. He insisted on paying. I said we could split it and he agreed, until the bartender brought over the bill and he literally grabbed my card out of the bartender's hand and gave it back to me. Apparently the bartender thought this guy should pay because he sort of chuckled when I again tried to pay and told me, "Nah let's let him get this one." The whole thing just seemed odd to me. I couldn't tell if the bartender had been listening and felt bad for me or if he somehow thought that this guy should be paying for me for some reason. I decided to let it go and just went to get my jacket.
BRP drove me home and we kissed in the car and I jumped out. He definitely wanted more of kiss, but I couldn't bring myself to sit in front of my house and make out with him like I have in the past. There is still something so off about the whole thing and I can't really put my finger on it.
He texted me again today to hang out, but I was studying so I told him that I would have to pass. He volunteered to come over and help and I told him he would just be a distraction. I got one of those stupid :P faces in response.
The last update I have for everyone is about the IndyGinger. I have still been talking to him almost every day. We talk either via text, facebook messenger, or actual phone call about nothing. Simply talking to him about the paper he needs to write brings a smile to my face. Its so weird. We've talked about the sex stuff we did, but we have yet to truly sext. It's oddly enough just to chat during the week.
One of the most recent calls I got from him lasted for well over 30 minutes. It wasn't the same happy guy that called me though. I finally figured out the problem with the IndyGinger. He is totally insecure. I don't know if its something to do with his family when he was growing up, the city he lives in, or some horrible ex-boyfriend he had but the IndyGinger has no self esteem. He is super concerned that his dick isn't big enough, his body isn't jacked enough, his hair isn't the right way, and that his physical appearance isn't good enough for anyone. It kills me. If he lived here I would date him in a heart beat. I would be really happy to see him as frequently as I could.
He is so eclectic and different that I can't imagine that he could feel so uncomfortable about his body. His muscles are something I could only dream of having and his dick isn't small (its definitely not huge but its nothing to laugh at either). I also learned that the IndyGinger has a history of suicidality. Typical right? Someone who I actually like, someone who I actually feel the need to continue to speak with despite being miles away from each other, thinks that they need to hurt themselves. I don't really know what to do. I am going to keep talking to him, because I can't help myself. I am also going to send him my copy of El Alquimista.
He is really into speaking/learning Spanish. He's not great, but he seems to really like it. I think that coupled with his lack of self-esteem just make it seem like he needs to read the book. Its a great story about accepting yourself for the gift you are and realizing what you already have and its something he needs to figure out. I feel like I want to save him. Again, its crazy, I know it, but I just can't help it.
So here I sit...blogging and watching reruns of the X Factor. I don't know what I'm doing. The more I try and be open and make things work the more confused I seem to get. For now I am just going to avoid analyzing anything. I am just going to accept things as they come. I am going to continue to do things that make me happy.
Well I guess that's it for now. Per usual if anyone has any advice feel free to send me a message or put a comment below.
Until Later,
Chau!!
I guess I should start with the oldest in the repertoire. This weekend I invited Hickey to come by so we could fool around again. Our Friends with Benefits thing has worked out far better than the two of us dating ever could have. We both have a mutual respect for each other and we both have pretty high standards for who we actually sleep with which is really comforting in a way. For instance, despite the fact that we have both gone out on dates with several people the only people we have had anal sex with in the last four months have been each other.
The other nice thing about the sex with Hickey is that we have both come to the understanding that sex is it. We aren't looking for it to be anything else. We are both really comfortable asking the other to do things sexually to get each other off. The freakier the sex gets, the better it is, and the more we both just really have a good time when we get together. All of the awkwardness from our first Friends with Benefits encounter is officially gone. We both understand what is happening and we have finally settled into a wonderful rhythm of fucking, sucking, and kinking. (I'm not sure if that is a word, but it is now!)
Every once in a while I get this feeling that Hickey is waiting for me to ask him to be my boyfriend, but he always assures me that is not the case. I'm hoping that is true because I could very easily be setting myself up for a repeat of the Panera incident....let's hope that does not happen...again!
The next person that I have updates on is BRP. As I have said before BRP is perfect for me on paper, but there is definitely something off about the whole thing. For this reason while I was away BRP texted me to say hi, but I did not respond. When I finally got back I let him know I was home and that I still had his hat from his night time visit, but I did not hear from him. It wasn't until the Saturday after Thanksgiving that I heard back from him. It was a very short message simply asking when he could retrieve his hat. It was late and I figured it must have been a drunken response to my text so I let him know I was still interested in seeing him.
I got a second equally as curt response. Not being one for passive aggressive games, I flat out asked if he was upset because his messages were so curt and almost bitter. He then went into a long explanation about that not being the case and we set up a time to see each other the next week. I almost had to cancel on him because of a patient emergency, but fortunately I was able to move things around and still make a late night coffee date work.
We met at 1369 Cafe in Inman Square. It was packed so we ended up just getting coffee and walking around Cambridge a little bit. Ultimately, we ended up stopping at a pizza place so he could get food since he still had not eaten and we both wanted a place to sit and talk.
The conversation was very cordial at first, no mention of the curtness from the texts, but I can never leave well enough alone. I picked the scab and before I knew it I was getting the litany of reasons that he was "pissed" not bitter about my lack of response to him while I was away. We had quite a discussion about his gripes with me.
What was really interesting was hearing all of the things that BRP considered red flags about myself.
Let me begin:
1. I'm young
2. I've never been in a relationship
3. I am sexually expressive/adept
4. I ignored him for 2 weeks
5. I am ambitious/driven
He qualified all of these statements with: "I mean you have all of these things which individually are red flags but together they don't bother me." How charming right?
I have to be honest; none of his 5 things surprised me. I recognize them as part of the issues I have in committing to any relationship anyways so the fact that someone finally recognizes them as issues in a relationship with me is something that I just have to come to terms with as I continue dating.
Ultimately, I can't do anything about the fact that I am young. I also could do something about never having been in a relationship, but I won't. I refuse to be in a relationship just to be in a relationship. I don't care if that means I am single for another 20 years. I am waiting for someone I really think is worth it. I could do something about the sexual expressiveness, but I don't want to. I like sex. I enjoy sex. It's fun and I am not going to apologize because I know what I want and I'm good at what I do. I could also do something about the ambition I have related to my career, but I won't. My career and my patients are really important to me and I am not going to change that just to please someone or enter into a relationship. The thing about me ignoring him for 2 weeks...well that I'll own. I definitely could have changed that and I definitely should have.
After he finished eating I offered to drive him home since he had driven me home the last time. I realized that things definitely still weren't right in the car, but I couldn't just send him back into his apartment when we got to his place. I felt like he was looking for an excuse to blow me off or just write me off completely and that annoyed me. I know this is absolutely insane, but I hate the idea that someone would write me off based on those 5 red flags. I felt like I needed to do something to prove he was wrong, even though he wasn't.
I am officially insane! I know and I can't help it. I went in for a kiss literally mid-awkward conversation where it seemed like he didn't want to see me again. I ended up in his apartment and we started making out. He stopped me and insisted that we not hook up. He told me he promised himself he wouldn't do that with me. I was being rejected sexually and I was stunned. I don't like the feeling that someone could just choose not to do something they wanted to. The idea that someone could have that kind of self control around me perturbed me a little bit. So I tried harder. Eventually I won him over and I was blowing him. Then I decided to respect his initial desires and stopped before he came. That was pretty bitchy of me but I couldn't help it. I had to prove the point that my sexual prowess could win him over.
I AM COMPLETELY INSANE!
I then left his apartment and hopped in my car and went home. I ended up seeing him again on Saturday for a cute lunch date in Harvard Square. I was super late (this is becoming a pattern for me unfortunately). We met at Tory Row and sat at the bar.
The restaurant was amazing: a great menu, a great atmosphere, and the bartender had an amazing ass. The fact that I am commenting on the bartender's ass should be a pretty good indicator for how my date went. I can't help but feel bad for how I behaved actually. I was sort of an ass. I was trying to treat him the way I treat a lot of my old friends. I was joking around and sort of making fun of him a little bit, but I'm not sure it really came off the right way. Luckily, this guy likes himself enough, and has a high enough self-esteem, that the whole time I was ribbing him he was pointing out how wrong I was.
When it came time to pay the bill I pulled out my card to pay. He insisted on paying. I said we could split it and he agreed, until the bartender brought over the bill and he literally grabbed my card out of the bartender's hand and gave it back to me. Apparently the bartender thought this guy should pay because he sort of chuckled when I again tried to pay and told me, "Nah let's let him get this one." The whole thing just seemed odd to me. I couldn't tell if the bartender had been listening and felt bad for me or if he somehow thought that this guy should be paying for me for some reason. I decided to let it go and just went to get my jacket.
BRP drove me home and we kissed in the car and I jumped out. He definitely wanted more of kiss, but I couldn't bring myself to sit in front of my house and make out with him like I have in the past. There is still something so off about the whole thing and I can't really put my finger on it.
He texted me again today to hang out, but I was studying so I told him that I would have to pass. He volunteered to come over and help and I told him he would just be a distraction. I got one of those stupid :P faces in response.
The last update I have for everyone is about the IndyGinger. I have still been talking to him almost every day. We talk either via text, facebook messenger, or actual phone call about nothing. Simply talking to him about the paper he needs to write brings a smile to my face. Its so weird. We've talked about the sex stuff we did, but we have yet to truly sext. It's oddly enough just to chat during the week.
One of the most recent calls I got from him lasted for well over 30 minutes. It wasn't the same happy guy that called me though. I finally figured out the problem with the IndyGinger. He is totally insecure. I don't know if its something to do with his family when he was growing up, the city he lives in, or some horrible ex-boyfriend he had but the IndyGinger has no self esteem. He is super concerned that his dick isn't big enough, his body isn't jacked enough, his hair isn't the right way, and that his physical appearance isn't good enough for anyone. It kills me. If he lived here I would date him in a heart beat. I would be really happy to see him as frequently as I could.
He is so eclectic and different that I can't imagine that he could feel so uncomfortable about his body. His muscles are something I could only dream of having and his dick isn't small (its definitely not huge but its nothing to laugh at either). I also learned that the IndyGinger has a history of suicidality. Typical right? Someone who I actually like, someone who I actually feel the need to continue to speak with despite being miles away from each other, thinks that they need to hurt themselves. I don't really know what to do. I am going to keep talking to him, because I can't help myself. I am also going to send him my copy of El Alquimista.
He is really into speaking/learning Spanish. He's not great, but he seems to really like it. I think that coupled with his lack of self-esteem just make it seem like he needs to read the book. Its a great story about accepting yourself for the gift you are and realizing what you already have and its something he needs to figure out. I feel like I want to save him. Again, its crazy, I know it, but I just can't help it.
So here I sit...blogging and watching reruns of the X Factor. I don't know what I'm doing. The more I try and be open and make things work the more confused I seem to get. For now I am just going to avoid analyzing anything. I am just going to accept things as they come. I am going to continue to do things that make me happy.
Well I guess that's it for now. Per usual if anyone has any advice feel free to send me a message or put a comment below.
Until Later,
Chau!!
Sunday, November 24, 2013
WTF Indy??
My trip to Indianapolis was a total success on a lot of different levels. First I was there for an amazing nursing conference. I learned a lot. I got to schmooze with a lot of really big names in nursing. I was inspired to continue my education ASAP. I didn't feel alone in the world of nursing academia for once.
The other success of my trip to Indy was a guy that I met. We met the first night that I was there and saw each other basically everyday I was in the city...
Let's start with some basic facts. I met the guy and we ended up together in my hotel room pretty shortly after I met him. He was cute, 27, a ginger, has long pony-tail length hair, nice body, pale as a ghost, and beautiful grey eyes. Think cast member from the revival of Hair...We ended up kissing pretty soon after meeting and I noticed the pentagram necklace around his neck. So I of course just had to ask. Mid tongue exploration of my mouth he told me that he was a witch.
Yes....a real witch. I asked him what he meant and he proceeded to tell me how he was a practitioner of Wiccan. I'm not one to judge so we continued making out. I was originally going to base his nickname off of this fact, but he asked that I not use his religion in making up his nickname so he is going to just be the IndyGinger.
***********************NSFW************************
Making out quickly turned to more... Before I really knew what was going on the IndyGinger had dropped to his knees and was undoing my pants asking me to throat fuck him. Now before this post goes any further I have to sort of put together a disclaimer. I am all about having good, safe, fun sexually. So if someone wants me to fuck their throat who am I to judge or not accommodate.
So we started fooling around and things got really dirty in a good way really fast. Eventually I figured that he could use a break and we started talking some more. The conversation was again so natural and so easy I couldn't believe it. I learned about a column he writes for a paper about horoscopes. He has two jobs on top of that. He is the oldest of seven....originally from Kentucky. Yes he has an accent...and is a self-proclaimed hillbilly...What was great is that after the talking he was just as into going back to the rough oral sex as I was.
The other amazing thing about hooking up with the IndyGinger is that he liked having fun while we fooled around. So he made a game of trying to guess my last name, my birth date, my astrological sign but involving the oral sex. It was honestly so much fun and hot all at the same time. We continued on in this way for a while until he finally wanted me to cum. I explained that I couldn't cum first and he made a quizzical face but just proceeded on. He grabbed my ass and shoved my dick as far down his throat as he could and he came within a minute barely touching his own cock. He then continued sucking me off until I came myself minutes later.
************************SFW*************************
We showered and he suggested that we do food or something. I agree for a lot of reasons, but mostly because the conversation had been good and the oral was awesome too. We headed to the grocery store to buy snacks, but ultimately decided that going to a diner for breakfast food would be the better option at this point. We walked into a diner called Peppy's which actually a fairly famous Indy landmark for locals.
Basically think Merlotte's from True Blood, but with less thick southern accents, and only white people. What was surreal is that I was sitting their with an out gay witch. It really was like an episode of True Blood in some ways. The cooks/waitstaff were phenomenal and joked around with both the IndyGinger and me. Then as we were about to head out it started pouring rain. As were walking back to the car he stopped me and kissed me in the rain. There was just something so very right about the whole thing.
The next day he texted me about going out to dinner. I agreed because after the convention was over there wasn't much for me to do anyway. Plus...he was cute, nice, different, and into me. Probably an hour before we were supposed to meet he asked if I would mind going to his place for dinner. I didn't have any objections so I figured it would be okay...I did make sure my friends from home knew though so I would be getting and giving text message updates...I was actually really excited to have met a nice guy for a change.
He picked me up and we went to his house...which he rents alone with the money from his three jobs...oh and did I mention he is in college too...he wants to go to med school to become a D.O. Immediately he started making dinner and I got to look around the house.
First let me say the house smelled AMAZING!! I'm not sure what it would feel like for a nose to have an orgasm, but if its possible mine may have had one, from the smell of the oils, the candles, and the food that was being cooked my nose was on total overdrive.
Secondly, the house definitely had a Wiccan vibe. I mean besides the altar room where he practiced, there was definitely signs of his religion throughout the house. From the paintings, to the sculptures, to the plants, to the furniture, everything was unique and had a flair of Charmed about it.
Finally in the kitchen it was very much like I had stepped into a hippy's place in Cambridge. Home grown and dried herbs, organic food, distilled water, everything looked as though it was right out of a home owned by a college professor and his wife. Dinner was chicken in a tumeric and garlic sauce, cous cous, and baked diced potatoes...DELICIOUS! He could cook and I was thrilled.
Conversation throughout dinner flowed just as easily as it had the day before our dinner date. Nothing seemed forced or contrived. It was just easy. I enjoyed hearing about his life and he was interested in mine.
After dinner we snuggled up on the couch and watched a crappy James Franco like we had been a couple for years. I laid on him and then when I got sick of that he just snuggled up into the crook of my arm. The movie ended and he offered to let me stay at his place. I thought about it and decided that it would be okay. So I went up to his room and we hopped into bed and simply fell asleep. Nothing sexual at all....just spooning.
We woke up a little late the next morning and he was actually late to work...but he insisted on driving me to the door of the hotel to make sure I made it there safely....which made him later to work. Despite his efforts to see me that night I insisted that he stay home and do his homework and sleep. He had to work after all and still had things to do for school...but we ended up texting back and forth all night.
The next day the effort to see me doubled and I relented. Though I blamed his own school work on my reasoning for not seeing him the day before a lot of the reason I didn't want to see him was because I was really beginning to like him and I knew I was leaving the coming Wednesday. My own desire to see the IndyGinger overcame my fear that I might actually miss him when I left.
************************NSFW***********************
He came over and we were talking and then making out and then fooling around and then he said he wanted me to fuck him. I had condoms...always prepared...just like a girl scout....my Mama taught me right....so I agreed. Unfortunately, he definitely was not use to bottoming. We waited and waited for him to adjust but it just didn't seem to be happening...so I said, "Listen if its not happening that's okay. We don't have to have sex." He looked totally dejected so I offered to bottom, but that just made him look more upset. I then insisted that we stop trying to have anal sex because the oral sex we had been having was so good. He agreed and we kept fooling around.
We again played a game this time involving him learning Spanish. It was fun and sexy and it just worked. Everything about us hooking up just worked. When we both finally came we showered and again started having some pillow talk.
*************************SFW************************
It was at this point that I brought up the fact that I was leaving. Neither one of us really wanted to talk about it. Neither one of us had a very good understanding of what was going to happen after I left. In discussing my trip home we both revealed that we had talked about each other with our friends from home. His friends, a girl and a former pornstar, couldn't believe that I was real. My friends felt the same way about him.
We also had the discussion about what would happen if I wasn't leaving the next day. We were both totally agreed that we would be dating. I'm sure that if he lived in Cambridge instead of Indianapolis I would make an effort to continue to see him and date him. Should that change though because of the distance? Neither one of us was sure. He finally left with a passionate kiss and a peck good bye. The minute he had walked out the door I could tell I was going to miss him.
Isn't that completely insane? I knew someone for four days and on my trip home I knew I was going to miss them. I swear I am losing my mind. I have been home for four days now and have spoken with him every day.
Yesterday I got this text: "So....I really miss you...a lot...lol. No joke"
I didn't even know how to respond. I miss him too. I let him know that I was willing to continue talking but I wasn't sure exactly how this would work. He agreed that for now texting and phone calls were probably the best idea since he doesn't have skype.
He called me today and we talked on the phone for at least 20 minutes. We didn't talk about anything particularly important: how our weeks had gone, how my trip home went, and other things we had talked to our friends about. The subject of how/if we should keep talking came up again and we both agreed for the second time that texting and a regular phone call would suffice for now.
I'm really unsure of how to proceed at this point. I've NEVER been in this predicament before in my life. I should not like this guy based on what he looks like on paper. He is from Indy, he is weird, he is from Indianapolis, and he is a hillbilly at heart, not to mention his religion. I can't help the fact that I still like talking to him. I smile every time I get a text message from him. The craziest thing is I have only known him for a little over a week and I feel this way.
I guess for now I am going to tread carefully. I don't know what the right decisions in this situation are and I don't think anyone really does. So I am going to keep and open mind, take one day at a time, and just see what happens. Who knows? Maybe the IndyGinger is the reason I was supposed to go to Indianapolis in the first place.
Until Next Time....
Chau!!
The other success of my trip to Indy was a guy that I met. We met the first night that I was there and saw each other basically everyday I was in the city...
Let's start with some basic facts. I met the guy and we ended up together in my hotel room pretty shortly after I met him. He was cute, 27, a ginger, has long pony-tail length hair, nice body, pale as a ghost, and beautiful grey eyes. Think cast member from the revival of Hair...We ended up kissing pretty soon after meeting and I noticed the pentagram necklace around his neck. So I of course just had to ask. Mid tongue exploration of my mouth he told me that he was a witch.
Yes....a real witch. I asked him what he meant and he proceeded to tell me how he was a practitioner of Wiccan. I'm not one to judge so we continued making out. I was originally going to base his nickname off of this fact, but he asked that I not use his religion in making up his nickname so he is going to just be the IndyGinger.
***********************NSFW************************
Making out quickly turned to more... Before I really knew what was going on the IndyGinger had dropped to his knees and was undoing my pants asking me to throat fuck him. Now before this post goes any further I have to sort of put together a disclaimer. I am all about having good, safe, fun sexually. So if someone wants me to fuck their throat who am I to judge or not accommodate.
So we started fooling around and things got really dirty in a good way really fast. Eventually I figured that he could use a break and we started talking some more. The conversation was again so natural and so easy I couldn't believe it. I learned about a column he writes for a paper about horoscopes. He has two jobs on top of that. He is the oldest of seven....originally from Kentucky. Yes he has an accent...and is a self-proclaimed hillbilly...What was great is that after the talking he was just as into going back to the rough oral sex as I was.
The other amazing thing about hooking up with the IndyGinger is that he liked having fun while we fooled around. So he made a game of trying to guess my last name, my birth date, my astrological sign but involving the oral sex. It was honestly so much fun and hot all at the same time. We continued on in this way for a while until he finally wanted me to cum. I explained that I couldn't cum first and he made a quizzical face but just proceeded on. He grabbed my ass and shoved my dick as far down his throat as he could and he came within a minute barely touching his own cock. He then continued sucking me off until I came myself minutes later.
************************SFW*************************
We showered and he suggested that we do food or something. I agree for a lot of reasons, but mostly because the conversation had been good and the oral was awesome too. We headed to the grocery store to buy snacks, but ultimately decided that going to a diner for breakfast food would be the better option at this point. We walked into a diner called Peppy's which actually a fairly famous Indy landmark for locals.
Basically think Merlotte's from True Blood, but with less thick southern accents, and only white people. What was surreal is that I was sitting their with an out gay witch. It really was like an episode of True Blood in some ways. The cooks/waitstaff were phenomenal and joked around with both the IndyGinger and me. Then as we were about to head out it started pouring rain. As were walking back to the car he stopped me and kissed me in the rain. There was just something so very right about the whole thing.
The next day he texted me about going out to dinner. I agreed because after the convention was over there wasn't much for me to do anyway. Plus...he was cute, nice, different, and into me. Probably an hour before we were supposed to meet he asked if I would mind going to his place for dinner. I didn't have any objections so I figured it would be okay...I did make sure my friends from home knew though so I would be getting and giving text message updates...I was actually really excited to have met a nice guy for a change.
He picked me up and we went to his house...which he rents alone with the money from his three jobs...oh and did I mention he is in college too...he wants to go to med school to become a D.O. Immediately he started making dinner and I got to look around the house.
First let me say the house smelled AMAZING!! I'm not sure what it would feel like for a nose to have an orgasm, but if its possible mine may have had one, from the smell of the oils, the candles, and the food that was being cooked my nose was on total overdrive.
Secondly, the house definitely had a Wiccan vibe. I mean besides the altar room where he practiced, there was definitely signs of his religion throughout the house. From the paintings, to the sculptures, to the plants, to the furniture, everything was unique and had a flair of Charmed about it.
Finally in the kitchen it was very much like I had stepped into a hippy's place in Cambridge. Home grown and dried herbs, organic food, distilled water, everything looked as though it was right out of a home owned by a college professor and his wife. Dinner was chicken in a tumeric and garlic sauce, cous cous, and baked diced potatoes...DELICIOUS! He could cook and I was thrilled.
Conversation throughout dinner flowed just as easily as it had the day before our dinner date. Nothing seemed forced or contrived. It was just easy. I enjoyed hearing about his life and he was interested in mine.
After dinner we snuggled up on the couch and watched a crappy James Franco like we had been a couple for years. I laid on him and then when I got sick of that he just snuggled up into the crook of my arm. The movie ended and he offered to let me stay at his place. I thought about it and decided that it would be okay. So I went up to his room and we hopped into bed and simply fell asleep. Nothing sexual at all....just spooning.
We woke up a little late the next morning and he was actually late to work...but he insisted on driving me to the door of the hotel to make sure I made it there safely....which made him later to work. Despite his efforts to see me that night I insisted that he stay home and do his homework and sleep. He had to work after all and still had things to do for school...but we ended up texting back and forth all night.
The next day the effort to see me doubled and I relented. Though I blamed his own school work on my reasoning for not seeing him the day before a lot of the reason I didn't want to see him was because I was really beginning to like him and I knew I was leaving the coming Wednesday. My own desire to see the IndyGinger overcame my fear that I might actually miss him when I left.
************************NSFW***********************
He came over and we were talking and then making out and then fooling around and then he said he wanted me to fuck him. I had condoms...always prepared...just like a girl scout....my Mama taught me right....so I agreed. Unfortunately, he definitely was not use to bottoming. We waited and waited for him to adjust but it just didn't seem to be happening...so I said, "Listen if its not happening that's okay. We don't have to have sex." He looked totally dejected so I offered to bottom, but that just made him look more upset. I then insisted that we stop trying to have anal sex because the oral sex we had been having was so good. He agreed and we kept fooling around.
We again played a game this time involving him learning Spanish. It was fun and sexy and it just worked. Everything about us hooking up just worked. When we both finally came we showered and again started having some pillow talk.
*************************SFW************************
It was at this point that I brought up the fact that I was leaving. Neither one of us really wanted to talk about it. Neither one of us had a very good understanding of what was going to happen after I left. In discussing my trip home we both revealed that we had talked about each other with our friends from home. His friends, a girl and a former pornstar, couldn't believe that I was real. My friends felt the same way about him.
We also had the discussion about what would happen if I wasn't leaving the next day. We were both totally agreed that we would be dating. I'm sure that if he lived in Cambridge instead of Indianapolis I would make an effort to continue to see him and date him. Should that change though because of the distance? Neither one of us was sure. He finally left with a passionate kiss and a peck good bye. The minute he had walked out the door I could tell I was going to miss him.
Isn't that completely insane? I knew someone for four days and on my trip home I knew I was going to miss them. I swear I am losing my mind. I have been home for four days now and have spoken with him every day.
Yesterday I got this text: "So....I really miss you...a lot...lol. No joke"
I didn't even know how to respond. I miss him too. I let him know that I was willing to continue talking but I wasn't sure exactly how this would work. He agreed that for now texting and phone calls were probably the best idea since he doesn't have skype.
He called me today and we talked on the phone for at least 20 minutes. We didn't talk about anything particularly important: how our weeks had gone, how my trip home went, and other things we had talked to our friends about. The subject of how/if we should keep talking came up again and we both agreed for the second time that texting and a regular phone call would suffice for now.
I'm really unsure of how to proceed at this point. I've NEVER been in this predicament before in my life. I should not like this guy based on what he looks like on paper. He is from Indy, he is weird, he is from Indianapolis, and he is a hillbilly at heart, not to mention his religion. I can't help the fact that I still like talking to him. I smile every time I get a text message from him. The craziest thing is I have only known him for a little over a week and I feel this way.
I guess for now I am going to tread carefully. I don't know what the right decisions in this situation are and I don't think anyone really does. So I am going to keep and open mind, take one day at a time, and just see what happens. Who knows? Maybe the IndyGinger is the reason I was supposed to go to Indianapolis in the first place.
Until Next Time....
Chau!!
Saturday, October 12, 2013
50 Posts and Still As Single As Ever!
Here we are at post 50 of this blog experiment and I am still as single as the day that I first started it. I have still never had anyone that I would consider a boyfriend. Still not a single soul that I would even introduce to my brother never mind my mother or father. I'm not sure if I am more disappointed in myself for not being able to sustain any semblance of an adult romantic relationship or if I am more disappointed in the absolute lack of any type of normal man that I would want to be in a romantic relationship with at this point in my life.
Yesterday was National Coming Out Day October 11th. I went out with one of my really good friends to dinner in the South End and then to a bar called Jose McIntyre's in downtown Boston. Dinner in the South End is always fun because the restaurants tend to be fairly well priced with excellent food and drinks and of course a friendly gay atmosphere. This night was no different as we went to Masa and had a grand old time. Then we headed out to Jose McIntyre's for a BC Law get together. I was assured that there would be a ton of eligible future lawyers and I figured What The Hell....
When we got to Jose's we didn't pay a cover at all and headed right up stairs where the DJ was already playing a great set and we both got drinks and just started schmoozing. As I was being introduced to friend group after friend group a few things became very apparent. One was that my friend really is super nice and it is impossible not to like her, which meant I had a lot of people to meet. Two was that I was probably the most ethnic person there and I am only half Portuguese. That's sort of a joke but not really, I think maybe there was one black couple there and a few latinos but that was pretty much it. Three was that as each group of friends met me and I was introduced they would ask what I do and when I would say I was an STD nurse. Then they would ask if I was my friend's boyfriend and there was always this awkward pause. You could see it in their face that they were searching for some sort of confirmation that I was gay or straight, because clearly I was not my female friend's State Street working beau.
I may have completely fabricated this in my head, but honestly that is what it felt like and I couldn't quite figure out why. I never like to leave it up in the air though so I would always make a comment or drop something in casual conversation to make sure that they knew I was open about my sexuality. It puzzled me for about 10-15 minutes because from what I could tell there were a lot of available guys on my team throughout the bar. I mean everywhere I turned my gaydar was pinging for one homo or another. Then it dawned on me when one of the girls asked me if I thought she could make out with a boy who was dancing in a circle and moving his hips like Shakira. "Ummm...yea I'm sure you could make out with him the gays love making out with straight girls." The look of horror in the girl's face said it all. The boy who she was so plainly talking about and who was so obviously gay to me was not out.
At this point I turned to my friend who had been joined by her boyfriend and asked point blank, "What the fuck? Are all of these guys in the closet? Do they have a weekly tea with the White Witch and Mr. Tumnus?" She looked at me and chuckled. I spent the rest of the night Dancing On My Own. And I was actually perfectly happy about it. Once all of my friend's Northeastern friends started to show up I really began just relaxing and having a good time. The drinks were good and cheap, the music was fun, and there was no reason not to have a good time.
Then the most gorgeous man I have seen in weeks walked onto the dance floor. He was about 6'4" tall, long brown hair (model long, not homeless long), pretty face, amazing body, white (?), and just seemed to be having a genuinely good time with a bunch of his friends. I gawked like any normal gay man, but ultimately went back to dancing with my friends because he was probably straight or in the closet and it just wasn't going to be worth my time. As the hour went by he kept getting closer and closer to me until we were literally back to back. I was a little taken aback by his dancing ability if I am being completely honest for a 6'4" white guy he at least had rhythm. Then he leaned down and just started talking to me. I was shocked. It wasn't about anything in particular, but still I thought it was weird. Then he went to the bathroom and came back and once again muttered something stupid to me about being underneath the air conditioner vent before going back to our dancing back to back position.
At this point my friend's boyfriend leaned in and asked me if the guy was hitting on me. I am not going to lie. I hoped so. He was gorgeous. I thought maybe this is it. The one truly gorgeous man in the bar on National Coming Out Day..wouldn't that be a fucking story....
So my female friend went right up to him and basically just asked, "What's your deal my gay friend likes you?" The response was typical, Sorry if I gave him the wrong impression but I'm straight. I wish I could say I was crushed, but I wasn't. I expected it. I think that may actually be worse, I was not even surprised that the gorgeous attractive man was in no way interested in me.
The night wore on and eventually it was 12:40 and it was time for me to head home before public transportation completely shut down. I got to the orange line and decided that I would just shut my eyes and wait for the train to show up. Naturally I spent at least 30 minutes waiting for the last orange line train. And when I finally opened my eyes it was because I thought I felt someone touch my leg. And there the creeper, some older black guy, was literally sitting and rubbing my thigh. I can't make this shit up! I moved immediately and threw his hand back at him. "Dude what the fuck keep your hands to yourself." I got on a train car and then the guy got on the same one. He literally followed me. Thank God when I got back to Sullivan I was able to get on a bus away from him and head home in peace.
I came to two conclusions last night.
One: I may not have someone in my life that I would want to have a romantic relationship with, but really that's okay. I do not want to settle for someone that is not right. I refuse to just be in a relationship to be in a relationship even if it means that I am going to the bar alone and dancing in a group full of couples for the next 10 years. Well....maybe not 10 years I don't want to be that creepy dude at the bar dancing far beyond his expiration date.
Two: Even if nothing else....at least I'm Out. I never realized how important that really is to me. I've never really thought about the whole being open about your sexuality thing. I've been out for so long and I really am so comfortable talking about it with anyone that I forget that for a lot of people it is not just that simple. The concept of being in the closet and faking a relationship with a girl or faking not finding the right one when they may be sitting in front of you but the same sex so you never let yourself like them is just crazy to me. So even if I end up alone at least I won't be worried its because I never gave it a shot it will be because my perfect other half doesn't exist.
The only thing that gives me the slightest bit of hope is a sentence that came from the most unsuspecting place last week. My boss is an older female nursing professor who has devoted her life to working with vulnerable populations and teaching students how to take care of them. She is married and has two adopted children and, in a nutshell, she is everything I want to be when I grow up. To get to my point though, while we were working at a clinic in PTown we were discussing future life plans because my nursing counterpart is pregnant and my boss looked at me and said, "Welll you're going to have kids one day so you'll see. I mean you are planning on having kids right? I mean I just always picture you with kids." I was totally taken aback because it just seemed like it came out of no where but it was nice. The nurse whose gut instinct I most trust thinks in her heart of hearts that I am going to end up married with kids. Its not a lot, but its enough hope to get me to keep this blog going until I finally find someone.
Until Next Time....
Chau!!!
Yesterday was National Coming Out Day October 11th. I went out with one of my really good friends to dinner in the South End and then to a bar called Jose McIntyre's in downtown Boston. Dinner in the South End is always fun because the restaurants tend to be fairly well priced with excellent food and drinks and of course a friendly gay atmosphere. This night was no different as we went to Masa and had a grand old time. Then we headed out to Jose McIntyre's for a BC Law get together. I was assured that there would be a ton of eligible future lawyers and I figured What The Hell....
When we got to Jose's we didn't pay a cover at all and headed right up stairs where the DJ was already playing a great set and we both got drinks and just started schmoozing. As I was being introduced to friend group after friend group a few things became very apparent. One was that my friend really is super nice and it is impossible not to like her, which meant I had a lot of people to meet. Two was that I was probably the most ethnic person there and I am only half Portuguese. That's sort of a joke but not really, I think maybe there was one black couple there and a few latinos but that was pretty much it. Three was that as each group of friends met me and I was introduced they would ask what I do and when I would say I was an STD nurse. Then they would ask if I was my friend's boyfriend and there was always this awkward pause. You could see it in their face that they were searching for some sort of confirmation that I was gay or straight, because clearly I was not my female friend's State Street working beau.
I may have completely fabricated this in my head, but honestly that is what it felt like and I couldn't quite figure out why. I never like to leave it up in the air though so I would always make a comment or drop something in casual conversation to make sure that they knew I was open about my sexuality. It puzzled me for about 10-15 minutes because from what I could tell there were a lot of available guys on my team throughout the bar. I mean everywhere I turned my gaydar was pinging for one homo or another. Then it dawned on me when one of the girls asked me if I thought she could make out with a boy who was dancing in a circle and moving his hips like Shakira. "Ummm...yea I'm sure you could make out with him the gays love making out with straight girls." The look of horror in the girl's face said it all. The boy who she was so plainly talking about and who was so obviously gay to me was not out.
At this point I turned to my friend who had been joined by her boyfriend and asked point blank, "What the fuck? Are all of these guys in the closet? Do they have a weekly tea with the White Witch and Mr. Tumnus?" She looked at me and chuckled. I spent the rest of the night Dancing On My Own. And I was actually perfectly happy about it. Once all of my friend's Northeastern friends started to show up I really began just relaxing and having a good time. The drinks were good and cheap, the music was fun, and there was no reason not to have a good time.
Then the most gorgeous man I have seen in weeks walked onto the dance floor. He was about 6'4" tall, long brown hair (model long, not homeless long), pretty face, amazing body, white (?), and just seemed to be having a genuinely good time with a bunch of his friends. I gawked like any normal gay man, but ultimately went back to dancing with my friends because he was probably straight or in the closet and it just wasn't going to be worth my time. As the hour went by he kept getting closer and closer to me until we were literally back to back. I was a little taken aback by his dancing ability if I am being completely honest for a 6'4" white guy he at least had rhythm. Then he leaned down and just started talking to me. I was shocked. It wasn't about anything in particular, but still I thought it was weird. Then he went to the bathroom and came back and once again muttered something stupid to me about being underneath the air conditioner vent before going back to our dancing back to back position.
At this point my friend's boyfriend leaned in and asked me if the guy was hitting on me. I am not going to lie. I hoped so. He was gorgeous. I thought maybe this is it. The one truly gorgeous man in the bar on National Coming Out Day..wouldn't that be a fucking story....
So my female friend went right up to him and basically just asked, "What's your deal my gay friend likes you?" The response was typical, Sorry if I gave him the wrong impression but I'm straight. I wish I could say I was crushed, but I wasn't. I expected it. I think that may actually be worse, I was not even surprised that the gorgeous attractive man was in no way interested in me.
The night wore on and eventually it was 12:40 and it was time for me to head home before public transportation completely shut down. I got to the orange line and decided that I would just shut my eyes and wait for the train to show up. Naturally I spent at least 30 minutes waiting for the last orange line train. And when I finally opened my eyes it was because I thought I felt someone touch my leg. And there the creeper, some older black guy, was literally sitting and rubbing my thigh. I can't make this shit up! I moved immediately and threw his hand back at him. "Dude what the fuck keep your hands to yourself." I got on a train car and then the guy got on the same one. He literally followed me. Thank God when I got back to Sullivan I was able to get on a bus away from him and head home in peace.
I came to two conclusions last night.
One: I may not have someone in my life that I would want to have a romantic relationship with, but really that's okay. I do not want to settle for someone that is not right. I refuse to just be in a relationship to be in a relationship even if it means that I am going to the bar alone and dancing in a group full of couples for the next 10 years. Well....maybe not 10 years I don't want to be that creepy dude at the bar dancing far beyond his expiration date.
Two: Even if nothing else....at least I'm Out. I never realized how important that really is to me. I've never really thought about the whole being open about your sexuality thing. I've been out for so long and I really am so comfortable talking about it with anyone that I forget that for a lot of people it is not just that simple. The concept of being in the closet and faking a relationship with a girl or faking not finding the right one when they may be sitting in front of you but the same sex so you never let yourself like them is just crazy to me. So even if I end up alone at least I won't be worried its because I never gave it a shot it will be because my perfect other half doesn't exist.
The only thing that gives me the slightest bit of hope is a sentence that came from the most unsuspecting place last week. My boss is an older female nursing professor who has devoted her life to working with vulnerable populations and teaching students how to take care of them. She is married and has two adopted children and, in a nutshell, she is everything I want to be when I grow up. To get to my point though, while we were working at a clinic in PTown we were discussing future life plans because my nursing counterpart is pregnant and my boss looked at me and said, "Welll you're going to have kids one day so you'll see. I mean you are planning on having kids right? I mean I just always picture you with kids." I was totally taken aback because it just seemed like it came out of no where but it was nice. The nurse whose gut instinct I most trust thinks in her heart of hearts that I am going to end up married with kids. Its not a lot, but its enough hope to get me to keep this blog going until I finally find someone.
Until Next Time....
Chau!!!
Monday, August 5, 2013
I Totally Forgot the Worst Part!
And I totally forgot the worst part....
I have professed on this blog before that I NEVER get hickeys. The one guy who was every able to give me a hickey was actually trying and it only lasted for a day...max....But after my rendezvous the other night I woke up to this. Its hard to tell in the photo, but it is two bite marks on my neck...Like I was bitten by one of the True Blood Vampires....
That's right the 5'4" Top Only Asian Harvard Architecture student managed to leave two bite marks in the shape of his actual teeth on my neck for three days. I have NO idea how that happened. I don't even really remember him sucking on my neck or a time when he bit me. The worst part is I wasn't even drinking so you would think that if someone bit me hard enough to leave to marks that I would at least have a recollection of the incident but honest to God...I don't remember a damn thing...
Oh well... Now I really think that's it....
Chau!
I have professed on this blog before that I NEVER get hickeys. The one guy who was every able to give me a hickey was actually trying and it only lasted for a day...max....But after my rendezvous the other night I woke up to this. Its hard to tell in the photo, but it is two bite marks on my neck...Like I was bitten by one of the True Blood Vampires....
That's right the 5'4" Top Only Asian Harvard Architecture student managed to leave two bite marks in the shape of his actual teeth on my neck for three days. I have NO idea how that happened. I don't even really remember him sucking on my neck or a time when he bit me. The worst part is I wasn't even drinking so you would think that if someone bit me hard enough to leave to marks that I would at least have a recollection of the incident but honest to God...I don't remember a damn thing...
Oh well... Now I really think that's it....
Chau!
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