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Thursday, June 20, 2013

When it Fucking Pours...And Then You Occasionally Get Struck By Lightning

I guess this is more of an update post than a really great one in general, but I haven't posted anything in a while so I figure I needed to say something. First let me blame my lack of posts on two things: 1. I just got a new job and have been working pretty regularly to try and stay on top of things and 2. I haven't even had a probably propositions for a date in over a month now.

Let's start with the good news. By some weird and strange coincidence I am still talking with and still have a thing for the Harvard Gaymer. We haven't gone on a date in over a month and I still feel inclined to text him or gChat him regularly and it always brings a smile to my face when I realize I got a text from him. I know this is stupid and sappy and definitely not the reason most people read this blog, but its the truth. I was going to try and phase him out throughout the summer because he was a virgin and so much younger than me but all of my friends have convinced me of what a bad idea that would be. I guess they are right to when it come down to it. This is the first guy in a long time that is low maintenance, into me, smart, funny, and that I am actually into on some level. So I guess the old motto, If It Ain't Broke Don't Fix It sort of applies although I guess it should be switched around a little to be more apropos, If It Ain't Broke Don't Fuck It Up. And thus ends the good news....

Onto the almost newsworthy updates....I've heard from two guys that I have been on dates with in the past within the past 3 weeks. Like the title says when it rains it pours....

The first guy to randomly message me out of the blue was Mereb...For whatever reason this motherfucker keeps just popping up back in my life. He Facebook messaged me a few weeks ago just asking me how I was doing. I responded very cordially. A brief and curt conversation began and he intimated that he wanted to get together for coffee or drinks to catch up. Being the asshole that I am and remembering full well that this was the guy who was going to FIX me I responded, "I thought that was what we were doing." After a few more knife twists in the conversation Mereb finally took a hint.

Here is what I really don't understand. You stopped dating me because you found the best boyfriend ever. He broke up with you and you immediately Facebook messaged me. In the course of that conversation you told me that you were planning on leaving the city in about a month or two. The last time you spoke to me before this you attempted to booty call me and then told me you were going to fix me. WHY on EARTH would I assume you were looking for anything other than to get your dick wet? Also if I rejected you as a booty call the last time what makes you think that I would change my mind. Do I come across as that desperate? I didn't think so, but who knows.

The next former guy that showed up literally out of the blue was KFlip. The weekend of Boston Pride I got a text message asking me out again and apologizing for not being in touch in so long. If I am being honest I was almost giddy when I heard from KFlip. He was such a good guy, cute, nice, had a good job, intelligent, his biggest flaw was that he wasn't out and wasn't comfortable really dating a guy. I honestly thought that after a few months he had worked on coming out and was finally ready to date someone for real. I was super excited.

We made plans to meet the Saturday night of Pride weekend to go out for drinks at a club. Around 10 o'clock I was still at work so I called to cancel/reschedule. He was more than happy to put it off until the Sunday. So we planned to do brunch and then the Back Bay block party. I thought that it would be a really cute date. We originally headed over to Thornton's which was closed, and then we went over to the Trident Cafe where the wait was WICKED long. Finally he suggested we go to CafeTeria, a really gay/shi shi brunch place on Newbury St. We ordered and split a jug of Bloody Marys and everything was going well. We were laughing there was some subtle arm touching and flirting. Then the check came and he insisted on paying. I sneaked a peak at the bill around fifty bucks so I thought, "Just as I remembered a gentleman. Nice! Score!" Then while the card was being run I asked about how else his life was going....

"Oh well I have a boyfriend now." It was like the scene in Jane Eyre when the tree is struck by lightning and starts bursting into flames.

 Seriously??? Then the best part was he followed that up with...."He isn't out either so it works out really well. And I've been faithful." WHAT THE FUCK??!?! You just paid for another guys expensive brunch, and are planning on going to a gay block party with him.

It was at this point that I turned into the bitter asshole that most people know me as. "Oh that's funny. Does he look as gay as you though because its not like he is that in the closet then?" I knew full well this was like pulling the cornerstone out of an archway and I was about to watch this man crumble in front of me but I couldn't help myself. What dickhead asks someone out on a date and halfway through insists its not a date? Really? REALLY? Then I spent the next half an hour explaining to KFlip how any homo with a halfway decent gaydar would spot him in a second and now in another second that he was a dick hungry bottom. I know I'm an asshole, but I really just couldn't help myself.

We went to the block party and he spent maybe a total of 45 minutes waiting for it to fill up....we were there pretty early.....and then he took off as soon as more than 25 people were in the vicinity. I didn't leave. Instead I just sat on the curb and drank and watched the festivities. I gave off a fuck off vibe to so no one even came near me. I called my lesbians to come but they were busy so eventually I just left, happy with the buzz I had gotten mid-afternoon.

I think that is pretty much it for now. I'm going to continue to talk to the Harvard Gaymer and then see what else happens this summer. I should be going to PTown for the week of the Fourth of July for work so who knows maybe I will fall madly in love with a stranger I meet down there. Maybe I won't meet a single person....maybe I'll meet a few (probably not since its a work trip but a boy can hope right).

Well until next time....

Monday, June 3, 2013

Summertime and the Livin is Easy.....So Far...

Its officially the beginning of June which means that it is officially the beginning of summer....And so far I have nothing to really report.

I recently graduated...YAY!!....and started a new job that is sort of an old job, but in either sense I haven't really had time for dating lately. The good news is that I am now officially a nurse and officially a grown up and officially still alone, but its all good.

Oddly enough I recently downloaded Grindr to my work phone so that we can use it for targeted outreach for at-risk gay guys. I've got to tell you that seeing Grindr in real life makes me so happy that I never used it in my personal life. I mean I can definitely understand the convenience of such an app, but just the thought of randomly fucking someone who I just met online without even so much as going for a drink first is just something that I'm not interested in....does that make me a prude? I don't think so, but I guess its all in your own perspective.

The Harvard Gaymer and I still talk pretty regularly. I told my friends about him and let them read some of the texts between the two of us and they all think that I need to give him a chance. Honestly he is pretty awesome. He is nice, a total dork, and really smart and super into me.....all positive attributes. I keep coming back to the fact that he isn't out and he is a virgin though. So maybe I am being ridiculous in thinking that because he is a virgin I can't continue dating him, but I really can't continue dating someone who is in the closet. I've been there and tried that and I KNOW it DOES NOT work! It might work for some people, but I am way too comfortable with myself to allow the person I am dating to not be okay with their own sexuality. Maybe I am over-thinking everything....I think I am just going to see what happens with this one. I'm still not going to limit myself, but I am definitely going to stay in contact.

In other interesting news....Mereb randomly facebook messaged me yesterday asking how my summer is going. I'm not really sure how I should take this.... In addition to the random facebook message I also learned a few months ago that another nurse and I are eskimo brothers via Mereb and it is quite possible that we were seeing him at the same time. So yea....

I don't want to be rude to Mereb, because that really isn't my style, but this time around I am definitely keeping my guard up. I'm not going to just let him in....I'm going to show him that he did FIX me a little bit.....I know enough now not to think he is a nice and kind as he lets on when he messages me.

I'm hoping that this summer I am going to be able to enjoy my life as a new graduate in the city. Make some good life choices and some fun life choices and avoid the poor life choice altogether. I'm going to spend some time at the beach and the bars and see what life has in store for me. You never know who you might meet right?

Until Next Time!