Updates...or Hauntings Depending on How You Look At It

As 2013 comes to a close apparently a bunch of the guys I went on dates with are going through their contact lists and deciding it would be a good idea to see exactly what I am up to again. So I thought I would share some of these updates with you. 

Romeo--Recently Romeo has started to play games of Words with Friends with me again. In these games he almost invariably kicks my ass, but always strikes up a conversation. I have learned his plans for post-graduation, checked in about his holidays, and have even talked with him about the every day goings on of his life. It's almost as if he is using Words with Friends as a way to text me and show interest without texting me and showing interest. Honestly, its not doing anything for me. I am responding and being cordial because there was a time that I liked Romeo and thought he was wonderful, but the truth is the being in the closet to his family thing is a deal breaker. Since that still has not changed neither have my feelings about the Death of Romeo. 

Geri--This guy is proving to be a bigger and bigger mistake with each passing month. He texted me this month inquiring as to whether or not he could get a test. I thought that he must have other options to get the test and was using this as a simple excuse to see me again, but I can't turn away a patient. I don't have it in me. He came in for the appointment and before he even sat down was commenting on my ass. REALLY? At that point I wanted to scream, but I kept it together and got through the risk assessment. It was actually one of the most awkward scenarios I've had in quite some time. I had to ask questions about his sexual history, which he then proceeded to try and make me feel awkward about. Then when I got to the substance abuse questions that I ask everyone he got very upset and almost angry. Geri was also clearly intoxicated when he came to see me so I really do think that he needs some sort of alcohol treatment, but at this point my hands are tied. He does not want to discuss that with me and I can't force him to so I simply gave him his test and sent him on his way. 

SkaterBoy--Anybody even remember him?? I actually haven't written about him in a while but he has always sort of been in the orbit of people that I know. For those of you who are just joining us or who have forgotten...this is a friend of Tiny's who I have had a HUGE CRUSH on for a very long time. The guy is a figure skater with an ass to die for and a good heart. He's a little intense when it comes to certain things, but I love that kind of unbridled passion. 

Well back to the point....he got an OKC account. He came up in my match ratings so I naturally rated him either a 4 or 5 stars so that if he rated me back similarly I would know that maybe he was interested. Well much to my surprise a day later I got a message from OKC informing me that indeed he had also rated me highly. So in an unprecedented maneuver...I actually messaged him first. I NEVER do that. It's like rule number one of online dating for me. I always respond, will always say yes to a first date, but I never make the first move. I guess part of me is afraid of being rejected and part of me thinks that I need a man who can take the initiative to be interested in me. For some reason I decided to buck traditional logic and go for it....and of course....NO RESPONSE. Typical! I'm okay with it though. My crush has been waning throughout the year and one time I saw him at the beach wearing shoes...yes he is a Shoebie so it would probably never work anyways.

Harvard Gaymer--Last week the Harvard Gaymer actually messaged me on OKC. It was a really cute message that basically boiled down to I miss you. That was nice. The conversation continued and it became a little bit more about catching up with each other. He is 21 now and asked if I might consider going out to a bar with him at least as friends since we did get along well together. I think that there really is no harm in that at all. Actually, I believe that he probably doesn't have a lot of gay friends who are of legal drinking age and it wouldn't hurt if I took him out to a gay bar or two and showed him the ropes. Unfortunately, the same problems that existed there before still exist. He is still not out to his family and he is young. I don't mean young in terms of his age, but in terms of his maturity level/comfortability with himself. 

BRP--Well since my last post about him he has actually messaged me again, but I didn't respond this time. I know that makes me sound like a horribly immature person, but he just isn't taking the hint otherwise. I have tried to be honest without hurting his feelings, but it is simply not working so just not responding is really my only option at this point. 

Hickey--We still talk and we still sext and we still booty call each other. I think that he definitely still has feelings for me though so I have to be careful about how often I talk with him. I don't want to give him the wrong impression and create a problem for myself in the future. I like what's happening now, but only because I think that we both have a mutual understanding that it is just a friendship with occasional bouts of sex. 

Tiny--I messaged him on Facebook not too long ago and we had a talk about his date. Neither one of us mentioned the sex. I didn't mention it because quite frankly it wasn't a thing for me and I'm willing to bet he didn't mention it because he didn't even cum. We are still able to talk just like we use to and I am thankful for that....I like my gay friends and would hate for that to change. 

So those are the updates for now on all my men....sometimes I think it must be some kind of sick joke and then I reread the blog posts....

Until Next Time!!

Chau!

Your Ass Tastes Minty....

I basically ended things with BRP recently. He kept texting me to hang out and every time we made tentative plans something kept coming up; a patient at work, a snow storm, the death of my phone battery. After two reschedules and BRP being more than understanding I realized I was not being fair. I wanted BRP to want me. I liked being wanted and wooed, but I knew there was something off about the two of us romantically. I still can't really put my finger on it just something in my gut that tells me a few dates were never going to turn into any legitimate. He took the news as expected, curtly, and I thought that I had probably heard from him with a final okay.

Then this weekend, again on Friday night. I assume he was out drinking and I got a text message that said one of my college friends who also works with the Senator was out with him and she wanted to say hello. That and she thought the two of us would make a fantastic couple. I didn't know how to respond at first. Eventually, I said hello to my friend and agreed that we should be a great couple. He questioned my use of the word should. I quickly explained that on paper we are really good for each other, but in real life it just doesn't seem to be fair to him. He makes time to see me and get coffee or dinner and I constantly cancel on him for one crisis or another. While I knew the romantic chemistry was not right too, I decided to leave that one alone.

For some reason whenever you question the romantic chemistry of another person with yourself they automatically become defensive. I find this absolutely hysterical. Its not like I am bashing you in anyway if I say the chemistry between the two of us isn't there. It has nothing to do with your attractiveness, your dick size, or your personality; if it was one of those things I would just say so. A lack or spark of chemistry is one of those unaccountable things. Its one of the unquanitfiables in the world. For a lot of people I think that concept is really hard. People like concrete things and answers to say that the chemistry just seems off appears to be a cop out to most. I assure you that is not the case. Some times, no matter how good someone is for you on paper (a nonwhite, out, musclebound, politico) there just isn't any chemistry. And other times when someone should have never even entered your list of possibilities (a white, longhaired, ginger, Wiccan) the spark of chemistry is completely undeniable.

This brings me to the next thing....I am still talking with IndyGinger. We text regularly, we both now follow each other on Instagram, and in the past few weeks I have even spoken to him on the phone at length a few times. What is really odd is that there are almost two versions of the IndyGinger when we speak on the phone. There is the IndyGinger who I met in Indianapolis who is really bubbly, happy, and optimistic and then there is the IndyGinger who is so riddled with self esteem issues and body insecurities that I feel like I am talking with a patient and not a guy who I like. We've talked about that and he agrees. Part of me wishes that he would move here just to get out of the toxic environment that is Indianapolis for him, but that will never happen. He is definitely very comfortable with where he is located. Again, I'm going to continue to talk to him and see where things go though, because there is no point in stopping something I really enjoy if at some point something could happen to reveal an opportunity where something might be able to work out for us.

Now to get to the fun stuff....I guess you can say that I buried the lead. Many of you may be new to reading this and may have forgotten about Tiny. Well so had I...romantically at least. I still consider Tiny a pretty good friend and he has seemed lonely since a lot of his gay friends moved out of the city this year. We were supposed to go out last weekend and I ended up staying in because of the snow, but I invited him over to my place to drink and watch crappy lifetime movies. Tiny of course brought his usual friend....the one who I have yet to name...I'm thinking Tiny's Sure Thing or TST for short. So Tiny and TST were both over and we were drinking and just generally having a good time. It was just a couple of gay friends hanging out and I genuinely thought that is how the night was going to progress. TST at one point put his arms around me but whenever I got touchy feely he simply lifted my hand and shoved it back on my own lap. I was getting mixed messages. After a little while, and feeling slightly rejected, I decided to head into my bed leaving Tiny and TST to sleep on the couch.

I was not even in my bed 5 minutes when Tiny came walking in the door and asking if he could share my bed. In my drunken stupor I agreed, and still thought nothing of it. Then Tiny was face to face with me and we started making out. Then his pants were off, then my pants were off, then his shirt, then my shirt, then before I knew it there we were naked and just going at it. I stopped it all and said, "For the record we are just friends who are hooking up right?" I wanted to know where I stood. I have always thought Tiny was attractive but have been so rejected by him before I didn't really know what to expect. Tiny then told me, "Yea we are just friends and I find you attractive and I want to hook up with you."

**************************************NSFW**************************************
With that we went back to making out and touching each other. Even though Tiny is short he is super aggressive. He always says that he is vers but the reality is he is all top and will occasionally bottom for a boyfriend who asks. I didn't mind the aggression because for the last 6 months I have been only hooking up with one person who really prefers bottoming. I wasn't sure if we were going to have sex, but I needed to make a few things clear with Tiny at this point since I know his MO. "I don't mind if you fuck me, but you have to wear a condom. I don't care if your dick gets soft." Tiny looked at me almost dejectedly and I didn't care. I have never had anal sex without a condom and I was most certainly not going to go down that road with Tiny. I then moved down to blow Tiny and get him rock hard. He has a good sized dick, but really his biggest asset are his balls. I would say 80-85% of Tiny's bulge, which is above average, is composed of his balls.

After I got Tiny going he flipped me over and started rimming me and fingering me. I have to admit this was a blast. I hadn't had someone aggressively rim me or finger me in a while and it just felt so good. Then it was time to fuck so he flipped me over one more time. As I was getting the condom and the lube Tiny looked at me and asked, "What do you clean your ass with because its delicious. Its like minty." 

I'm telling you I couldn't make this stuff up if I fucking tried. For the record, I don't try to have my ass taste minty. Its not like I am giving myself a Scope Enema or anything. I do however have a brand of soap Every Man Jack that is one of the all natural Trader Joe's types of liquid soap that I use that apparently has some lasting effects. So if you are looking for my secret to a minty ass...I would use a mint scented soap and wash you asshole with warm water and soap while you shower :)

The condom went on and Tiny's dick didn't immediately soften so I tried to get on top at first. This was a HUGE failure. I forgot that when you don't bottom for a while it takes some time to get yourself back into the swing of things. I eventually got myself into the doggy position and after a 3 minutes adjustment period was ready to go. Tiny was pounding away and I was loving it. It felt fantastic. Tiny was grabbing my hands behind my back for leverage and really going to town. We changed positions again and everything was fine, but as we attempted to change how we were fucking for the third time Tiny's dick became like Play-Do after sitting in the sun all day.

Tiny tried fervently to bring the blood back into the shaft of his penis so he could finish what he started but it seemed as though nothing was working. I decided the whole situation was getting pretty sad. Even if Tiny couldn't fuck me maybe I could blow him, or jerk him off, or something so that he could cum...and in turn I would be able to cum. I threw out the option to Tiny and he requested being able to jerk off onto my back while he fingered my hole. I obliged and flipped over. Within seconds Tiny found my prostate and began stimulating it like a democrat trying to fix the economy (see I can make political jokes too). I was loving every second of it and Tiny definitely appeared to be getting close. After a few minutes of fingering I had a first. I orgasmed without actually cumming. As Tiny was fingering my prostate I could feel these pre-orgasm muscle contractions starting to develop in my arms, stomach, and legs, then before I knew it I was hit with this wave of ecstasy. It felt just like I was cumming only....no cum....It was fascinating. At that point I think Tiny assumed I had cum. He flipped me over and seemed a little surprised to see nothing but my raging hard on  staring back at him.

**********************************SFW*****************************************

Tiny finally gave up. I told him that it was okay of course because that is what you are supposed to do in these situations, but I really had a good understanding of what had happened. Tiny always blames a condom, but he is also usually intoxicated when he hooks up with people. I think Tiny has a lot of self-esteem issues. I know, from being his friend, that his anxiety is out of this world.  The fact that Tiny and I hooked up is an indicator to me not that he is into me but that he needed to prove people liked him. I also think that most of the reason Tiny hooked up with me is because he wanted to make TST jealous.

Whatever the reason, it happened and I didn't hate it. Even though neither one of us came, I still enjoyed myself. I have no real feelings for Tiny, probably even less after the situation last night, but he is still a really good friend. I don't think there is a problem with hooking up with one of your good friends.

Gay people get shit for this all the time. That we sleep with all of our friends. I have a news flash for everyone though....so do straight people. It just so happens that it usually breaks down differently. Allow me to explain. Generally speaking, straight people have friends within their own gender groups ( a group of guy friends or a group of girlfriends). Almost inevitably (most clearly evident in college) a group of guys befriends a group of girls. These two groups then pass each other back and for like a bowl of mashed potatoes on Thanksgiving. The difference between straight people and gay people is that gay people have no base friend group to retreat to after their hookup. Straight guys retreat back to their boys and straight girls go back to their biddies discussing each of their triumphs and travesties with the people in their opposite, but corresponding gender friend group.

This morning TST jumped in bed with Tiny and I and we went back to our conversations about boys, school, and life in general as if there was nothing unusual with Tiny being in his underwear in my bed, which in truth there wasn't at all. Tiny did have a fairly sizable hickey on his neck though (apparently I am more aggressive than I anticipated). I felt bad, not because TST figured out who had given Tiny the hickey, but because Tiny had a date that afternoon. OOOOOPS!! I guess I'm just glad it wasn't my date. I brought both Tiny and TST to the train and saw them off on their way. I am sure that I will continue to be friends with Tiny regardless of whether or not we ever hook up again. He is funny and neurotic and fits in quite well with the gay position that I need filled in my life.

Thinking that is all I have for now. I might have more after Christmas but you never know. Don't hesitate to say Hi!! Also....Merry Christmas,

Chau!!!

A Lot of Duplications...

I had a date for the first time since coming back from PTown on Thursday with a guy I met from OkCupid. It was more or less a typical kind of date for me. This guy had a lot of similarities with other disastrous dates that I have been on. The oddest part was that each duplicate thing on its own was a less extreme version of some previous date nonsense but collectively made for one typical date of ridiculousness.

I guess I should start with this guy's name....or my nickname that is....Mini Asian Harvard Architect or MAHA....

So MAHA invited me to go for coffee at Cafe Algiers which was actually a really excellent date choice. I was running a little late which unfortunately happens all the time with me...I really need to get better at that, but I digress. I showed up and MAHA was sitting at the table waiting patiently for me. I got a delicious mint coffee and he got mint tea and we actually had a really great conversation talking about traveling, work, and prostitutes (I think anyone who has a conversation for more than 5 minutes with me ends up talking about prostitutes though). After much talking we decided to go for a walk around Harvard Square but before hand we both wanted to go to the bathroom. I headed to the bathroom first and then he went when I got back.

******Completely Off Topic

I would like to take a moment just to comment on bathroom etiquette while on a gay date. Every gay man should know that you can't both go to the bathroom at the same time. If two gay men go to the bathroom at the same time while on a date everyone assumes that they are hooking up in the bathroom. If two gay men go to the bathroom at the same time while on a date one of them will assume the other wants to hook up in the bathroom. If you truly want to have a respectable date everyone knows you have to go to the bathroom at different times.

*******Back on Topic

When MAHA got up to go to the bathroom was the first time I realized how short he was. Seriously, I'm going to be generous and say that this guy was about 5'4" When we started walking around Harvard Square I realized that he had a really cute butt and was actually quite adorable....a perfect Pocket Gay, a little reminiscent of Tiny.

As we continued our walk through Harvard Square MAHA started pointing out to me all of the different buildings and there architectural significance. It was actually quite adorable. We ended up outside of one of the gardens of the graduate architecture school. I couldn't take it anymore and just had to kiss him. We then proceeded to kiss and make out overlooking Harvard Square for a good 20-30 minutes. At the end of the 20-30 minutes somehow MAHA and I ended up going back to his place so he could grab his stuff and join me back at my place.

Once we got back to my place we started fooling around after I had picked up my room a little while he was in the bathroom peeing. I really had not intended this date to go in this way at all so I hadn't even really made my bed....Ooops!

Well after making out for a while and MAHA vigorously grinding his crotch into my own I stopped him and just had to ask, "So are you a top or a bottom? I mean I know we said no sex, but I'm just curious." He looked at me and actually told me to guess. What was confusing about this guy is that at first glance he definitely should be a bottom...he is 5'4", Asian, cute bubble butt....however his body language and demeanor screamed top...well except for the being a pussy about making a move to kiss me part.  Sure enough he told me that he was exclusively a top. Isn't that always the way though....just like with who's gay and who's straight. 
*************************************NSFW*************************************
We continued to fool around and each one of use proceeded to lose more and more clothing until finally we were both naked. It was at this moment that I realized he was completely hairless except for his head, a little bit of his pubic hair directly above his cock, his legs and his arm pits. Now I am not a guy that particularly likes hair, but on someone so short and petite that lack of body hair really seemed odd. 

Eventually, I, of course, was sucking his dick. To be honest, for a full blooded Chinese guy he actually had a decent sized dick. It was by no means massive, but it was of average size and was nothing to be ashamed about certainly. And it dripped precum pretty steadily the whole time we were fooling around so that was cool.  

After sucking his dick for a while and watching him squirm during the blowjob I finally went back up to kiss him which he allowed me to do rather reluctantly. This annoyed me if I am going to be completely honest with you. I can understand a straight guy being an asshole about something like making out with his girlfriend after he cums in her mouth, but a gay guy after a blowjob that didn't end in a cumshot? Come on dude...MAN THE FUCK UP!!

Eventually we were back to fooling around with a lot of heavy touching and a few things of note happened. Firstly, he revealed to me that he loved thigh fucking a guy. (So this is the second guy over 30 in the last month who was into thigh fucking....WHEN DID THIS BECOME A THING??? Did I miss a gay meeting or something? Is it in the minutes? I wish someone would enlighten me about this phenomenon and why all of a sudden so many of the guys I am seeing are into it.) Secondly, the guy kept making an intimation that he would like to move the whole situation to the shower. It was an odd request especially since no one had even cum yet and there was no mess to clean up. Thirdly, the guy definitely hated sucking cock. He would bring his head down to my dick and lick the shaft once before totally giving up. I had never really run into this problem before if I am being honest. Usually gay men love to suck dick and if they don't then they never even make the effort. But to make such a feeble effort to lick my dick twice like a Bertie Botts Booger flavored lollipop was just too much. Eventually I got him to suck it properly, but I didn't want to push it. 

After fooling around for a few hours I finally just started really teasing the hell out of the guy between my hands and my mouth. And then he said, "Okay so I know that you made that joke about working with 'your' people earlier, but seriously were you ever a hooker?" I was so taken aback by the comment that I didn't even respond. Instead I just focused my efforts and made the guy blow a huge load all over himself. 

That is rude though right? I mean even if you think your date use to be a hooker shouldn't you just keep that thought to yourself? What if I had been a hooker when I was younger....would you really want to know that? Would you really want to rehash those memories for me mid-blowjob? 

After he came he was clearly uncomfortable with the cum on his body so I offered to shower with him. We both hopped in the shower and he kept trying to convince me to get myself off, but I just didn't feel like it. We then ended up just cuddling and going to bed. I was big spoon...which just further confused me about his Top Only status.

 I woke up early to the sounds of heavy rain and thunder and lightning. I was immediately turned on. I don't know if I am the only person who feels this way, but there is something so erotic about a thunder and lightning storm that I become instantly horny the minute one begins. It was really convenient that MAHA had his chest and hard dick pressing against my own. We proceeded to fool around in our early morning haze until he got a phone call probably around 7. He answered the phone and it was his mother who told him that she would be waiting for him at South Station at 8am to head back to Connecticut with him, where they both lived. 

I almost started giggling it seemed so ridiculous, but I held it together and simply said, "So you should go then?" And his reply was actually pretty nice, "No I have at least 5 minutes....do you think you can cum that fast?" I laughed and just got to work....I busted pretty quickly and he insisted that he could not cum or he would fall asleep on his mother. We then got dressed and I drove him to South Station with a raging hard-on hiding in his jeans. 
*****************************SFW********************************************
On the ride to South Station I made a comment about maybe coffee again some other time or drinks and he was very vague and noncommittal in his answer which I assume means he wasn't really interested in a second date. To each his own I suppose. At South Station he got out of the car and actually gave me a kiss good bye before heading into the train station to find his mother and I headed to Dunkin Donuts to grab a coffee on my way home. Once home I hopped in bed and just passed out for a few hours before I woke up to a gloriously sunny day and brought my ass to the beach. 

Its funny how this guy on paper seemed so good, but in practice was just so clearly not right. I don't know how I am ever going to find someone who is as good in real life as they are on paper. However, on the bright side at least this guy was out. Judging by some of his behaviors when we were fooling around I am going to say that he is probably pretty sexually repressed but at least this time it is because of his Asian heritage and not because he is afraid someone is going to find out he is gay....Its a step in the right direction. YAY for little victories!!! 

Well I guess that is all I have for this time...
Until my next date!
Chau!!

The Summer Thus Far....

I haven't really updated this blog in a while for a few reasons.

       1. I haven't really had the time

       2. I didn't really know what I should write about

       3. There hasn't been any major change since my last post

I guess this is the update though...

WASJC= This is completely over. Since our third lunch date we haven't spoken or texted...it was a mutual thing I think.

Mereb= Over and a sour taste in my mouth. We went on a few dates and the last one he asked me if I had been dating other people. I was honest, and so was he....apparently he found the love of his life. However he told me that he wanted to fix me....because in his words I was afraid of being serious.....ding ding ding..what do we have for him Johnny....DUH?!?!

Artsy= Well we had sex and it wasn't bad....I wasn't really prepared to have sex so it wasn't the best either, but he was really into it. He went back home for the summer to be a lifeguard and we have actually spoken a few times since....he could turn out to be a great fuck buddy next year so I am going to keep that going. 

Tiny= That crush is over. He is madly in love with his former fuck buddy whether he chooses to admit that or not. He also drinks a lot and after some thinking is really just too nice and too bitchy all at the same time for me, if that even makes sense. 

There have really only been three new people since my last post...nothing crazy. No seriously, nothing crazy I only had sex with one of them. 

The first one was actually only a crush. He was a friend of Tiny's we will call him SkaterBoy....no not like skateboarder, like figure skater. My crush on him was actually pretty bad. He is gorgeous with an amazing body and a good personality. He kept popping up in my life too, which I of course took to be a sign from God, but it was probably all in my head. Ultimately this crush crashed and burned when I saw him at the beach. The way a person acts and interacts at the beach is a BIG deal to me. If you have a shitty beach personality then we will never work, even as friends. He wasn't into playing frisbee or just enjoying company on the beach, he whined about getting splashed, and then worst of all he wore his shoes to walk on the sand....That was the Pièce de résistance...Crush OVER!

The second one I never met in real life. I went on two different skype dates with him and he seemed perfect. We'll call him LaxGuy who had a good job and was intelligent. Only problem was he lived in Burlington. I am pretty sure he found someone closer to home because I haven't heard from him since our last date, but he didn't defriend me from facebook or block me from Gchat or Skype so who knows maybe in the future something could work out. I'm not really holding out hope though.

Then there was the third guy, we'll go with PillHead. Basically a frat boy waiting to get into the military. He was more of a Poor Life Choice (PLC) of convenience more than anything else. He was there and sexually aggressive and I was horny as fuck....So we did just that. It didn't go anywhere beyond the one time fucking though because I found out how bad he was in bed and that he had a little addiction to percocet....not to mention a kid with two black lesbians...

I think that pretty much sums up the last three months. 

I have date tomorrow with someone I met online. He seems nice, cute, well traveled, and lets face it he is interested in me which is half the freaking battle right?

Until next time...Chau!